Now.

“Now is the best time to start becoming the person we want to be.” – Dieter F. Utchdorf

Capitol HillI have several bad habits. I could start the list, but it would go on and on and possibly never end. Instead of listing them all, I will tell you one of the worst. I am a major procrastinator.

I don’t procrastinate because I’m too lazy or because I’d rather do something else. I procrastinate because I get overwhelmed and stressed out. Instead of starting somewhere I just don’t start. If my to-do list is more than three pages long, there’s a large chance it will stay that way for a good three days. I’m not proud of this! I don’t like it. I try very hard to not be this way.

I’ve started to notice that this has been spreading from my to-do lists to my life. This happened to me a lot during college. I would have so many papers to write or lines to memorize that I would take a nap. Now I have so many goals that I am overwhelmed and so I don’t chase after any of them. I have so many bad habits that I am overwhelmed  and so I don’t fix any of them. I have so much heart ache that I am overwhelmed so I don’t take time to heal any of it. I often feel stuck in the same place because of fear, because of anxiety, because I am overwhelmed. It is easier to not start than it is to not succeed.

I am tired of not being in control of my life. I am tired of not being who I want to be, because I feel held back by emotions, circumstance, or fear. Maybe you understand. Maybe you haven’t applied for the job you would like because you’re afraid you won’t be chosen. Maybe you haven’t submitted your book to any publishers because you’re afraid it will not be liked. It’s normal to be afraid of risk. It’s normal to feel held back.

I found myself bargaining about when I would begin working on a certain goal. Finally I said, “Now.” I’m beginning now in very small ways, because it seems better than not beginning at all.

I hope that you know, you can begin where you are. I hope that as you start now, you realize that you don’t have to succeed now – life is an ongoing process (you are an ongoing process). I hope you know that just by starting, even something small, great things will begin happening.

Signiture2.0

 

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2 thoughts on “Now.

  1. Jana says:

    You’re amazing. I’m so proud of you for lots of reasons. You’ve really inspired me to start blogging again and I’m going to work on procrastinating less, myself. If my Belle can become better, so can I. Thanks for being transparent in a very human way. You’re the best!

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